Shattered Shards
by Wordsintothevoid
Summary: Nico suffers a panic attack when he hears of Percy's death. Pernico! Requested by UnicornsAreDeadly


"So, where's Percy?" Nico asked with a smile, hoping to conceal his worry.

Everyone looked at each other desperately, and Nico's stomach clenched. Finally, Annabeth stepped forward. "Nico. I'm so, so sorry."

That one phrase destroyed his entire world. "How?"

"Nico..."

"How?"

Annabeth sighed. "We were cornered between a giant in front and a cliff behind. Percy was in front. The giant threw him off the cliff into the water."

Nico's eyes snapped open. "Water. But-"

Annabeth shook her head and a tear spilled down her cheek. "We searched. For hours. It wasn't normal water."

Nico stared at her. Then, he whirled and ran. Pushing people out of his way, dodging trees. He found himself in the Poseidon cabin.

Nico curled into a ball on the floor and lay there, panting. The room smelled like the sea, but it also smelled like Percy, the salt of the ocean mixed with pine trees and fresh air. Nico had always joked that Percy should rename Febreeze after himself. Percy had always just laughed and said Nico smelled like pomegranates and if that wasn't girly, he didn't know what was.

Then the sobs started. Gasping, full body, racking sobs that left Nico choking. Nothing. He was nothing. He didn't deserve Percy. So now Nico was alone. Again. Nico should have been used to it by now. He didn't understand why it still ripped him apart. Every. Single. Time.

The mother he barely remembered. Gone. Bianca. The loss that had tore him apart. After years of unsuccessfully trying to fix the hole in his chest, Nico had let Percy into his life.

Six months. They had been together six months. Percy had seen how deeply Nico was broken and he had rebuilt him. Just with words. Whispered words of "my angel" and "you're beautiful" and the simplest one of all, "I love you". Nico wore those words like armor. Until one phrase, " I'm so, so sorry" had dissolved all the glue around Nico's jagged edges. At his core, Nico was just shattered shards.

Nico couldn't breathe. Desperately trying to pull air into his lungs, he thrashed on the cool floor. I'm going to die of grief. A fitting end for a Greek hero. No, not hero. Monster. A monster for thinking he had any claim on the hero Perseus Jackson. A monster, an abomination, born of list, good for nothing except to bring more death and heartache into the world.

His fingers, scrabbling at his throat, irrationally thinking of some obstruction, but his clammy hands slid right of his skin.

His heart pounded in his ears and the only emotion Nico knew now as terror. Worse than the Underworld. Almost worse than Tartarus. He closed his eyes, begging any god out there just to allow him to slip into darkness.

But he couldn't. There were strong arms holding him closed, then the softness orealiaze Hands brushing his sweaty hair out of his tightly closed eyes. Nico was too far gone to register the mystery person's identity but he knew he was safe. Warm hands held his icy ones and he was held close, cuddled to the person's chest.

Ever so slowly, Nico relaxed and now he could hear a voice. Reassuring and encouraging, the voice always held a carefully concealed tinge of worry. Words drifted through Nico's wall. "Angel. Come back to me. You're safe "

It wasn't until Nico recognized the smell did he realize the identity of his savior. Sea air and pine.

Nico slowly opened his eyes. Sea green eyes stared back.

Suddenly, Nico was on top of Percy in a hot, hungry kiss. Nico couldn't believe his senses. Percy was here, not drifting in an unknown sea. Percy's hands tangled in Nico's hair, his body safe and strong under Nico.

Nico couldn't hold his breath any longer and he sagged against Percy's chest, panting. "Annabeth said you were dead. Drowned." His arms tightened around Percy involuntarily.

"The giant altered the water so I couldn't breathe it or control it. I prayed to Dad though and he sent hippocampi to save me and tow me back to camp."

"Why didn't you tell the others?"

"I was gone by the time they started looking. Thought I could crash my own funeral again." Percy grinned, the lazy smile that always made Nico's breath catch. But his smile faded quickly. "I got back to camp and everyone was glad to see me but no one knew where you were. I searched all over and was coming back here in defeat and then I found you... I thought I was going to lose you. What was that?"

"A panic attack, I guess. I've never had one before."

Percy shuddered. "Don't do that again."

"Don't die."

"Deal."

And they were kissing, and all Nico could think about was how even shards could be beautiful if someone loved them.


End file.
